“Connection comes from understanding, compassion and care.”
Sitting down (via Zoom) to chat with Palesa Koitsioe, an Intuitive Mindset Coach, who launched her business, Imbali Bloom Consulting, in 2020, during the beginnings of the Covid pandemic.
“Palesa means flower in Tswana and Imbali is the Zulu version of flowers.
If we can bloom as effortlessly as a flower without judgement; without any kind of wanting but blooming, then I would have done my job.”
Originally from South Africa, Palesa has lived in Vancouver for 4 years and states, “This is probably the biggest thing I’ve done by myself. Starting over (in a new country), without a lot of support.”
It was in South Africa that she first became intrigued about therapy, the process and how it can help others.
“Having someone to just sit and listen I thought, maybe this is something I could do?”
Obtaining a degree in psychology and an honors degree in neuroscience, to aid her in figuring out why people do what they do; to figure out the human process.
“The certificate, the diploma, the degree, the signed piece of paper, doesn’t make me a better life coach, it’s the knowledge. And that knowledge can be gained in other ways, and not just through an institution.
I came in through psychology, but there are other ways that I could have gained the same understanding.”
“I did a lot of experiments on myself – psychological, behavioral, emotional experiments.
I started emotionally fasting and suppressing specific emotions. I would suppress sad or ugly emotions and also happy emotions and that’s when I figured out I need to find a balance.”
“This (being a coach), gives me an opportunity to find out what humans are like, what holding space is. What sitting in a room listening to someone can do for them. “
“My dream is to open a private practice neuroscience clinic in SA to help those with traumatic brain injuries; to write a poetry book, a book about dating, arghh! I have so many ideas!”
“We don’t get taught a lot of things in school, that we should get taught, so how do you figure it out if you don’t try it? We need to be able to experiment as young kids.”
Palesa’s end goal is to help people self-actualize, to increase self-confidence & self-esteem.
“How can others gain control over themselves in order to be a badass, like me?!”
“Friends at a young age would say ‘why are you so confident?” and I didn’t know what that was. I just knew I was a badass. Even if I failed at something, I was still a badass. The internal work of seeing your magic and others seeing your magic. That made me so self aware of how awesome I am.”
“To be authentic is to be who you are, in your skin, in your body; you are your understanding of yourself completely.”
“As a coach, you have to model how to take care of yourself. When someone says you need to take a break – what does that mean? It could be closing your computer screen, laying on the floor and doing breathing exercises. To be able to show people that it does work, by doing it yourself. To be able to model to people.”
“When it comes to imposter syndrome & creativity, it’s interesting because when I’m creating there is no imposter syndrome. I love being on camera and sharing my stories and information. But it’s the interim. There’s this pause where I know I have to post something and the reflecting; that’s when the imposter syndrome kicks in.”
“When planning my coaching sessions, I’m very process orientated. Planning is my forte.
I tailor the sessions to clients specifically. I ask why do you need someone outside of yourself to help you get to where you want to be?
I ask them what their ‘problem’ is and why they come to coaching.
With this information I then update the course so it’s applicable to the individual.”
“I think adapting the examples or theme of the session to what the client wants to talk about on that day.
I have learnt a lot. I’m taking notes constantly, of what they’re saying, and also notes of what they’re saying of the dynamic. When I ask a question maybe I need to pause for longer, or when I ask a specific question, this client reacts this way.”
“I’m noting the behaviour of the coaching practise and not the questions themselves. What is the best way for it to come out?”
“And teaching goes both ways. After each call I come off and I realise something new – I didn’t know being a coach meant sometimes sitting there for 40 mins while my client talked themselves through the process, or just actively listening.”
“I think I’m more assertive and confident as a person, and that’s the biggest change for me, being a coach. Being able to sit with a client, to stand in front of a crowd and being more secure and confident in what I’m saying. Fully believing in coaching, the process and how it works.”
“I have a coach as well. It’s given me an understanding of how amazing this skill is to have, especially as a coach, and having different coaches. My current coach focuses on business, helping me with all the things I don’t like! I believe in having different coaches for different moments in your life and different areas.”
“For me, a good coach is someone who can mirror and mirroring in terms of (don’t make me sound like a jerk!), but people in this industry tend to listen to respond. I’m looking for a coach to listen to understand, and can give me back what I’m saying, not give me their impression.
That’s very nuanced. When you’re talking to somebody you want to know that what you said makes sense.
And what better way, than for them to tell you what you said, but in their own words.
It helps us to unlock all of the little things. Sometimes when we’re talking out loud, our brain doesn’t think, it’s just this massive download. And then afterwards it’s like, I did say that!
A good coach can mirror what I said and then I can check my words, my thoughts, my framing.
I want my clients to check what their words, their thoughts, their framing. It’s about being client centered.”
And that’s what I want my clients to feel.”
To connect with Palesa on Instagram you can find her at imbali_bloom_consulting
Or to discover more of her coaching offerings, visit her website, PoetryAsFloetries